Companionable Silence

As a mostly introverted person that struggles with “casual conversation” and always feeling like I need to find the next thing to say to keep the conversations rolling, I truly appreciate when I am around someone or multiple someones that accept and appreciate when no one is trying to find the next thing to say. When we can sit in complete silence and not feel uncomfortable or feel the pressure to say something. When you feel so at ease in each other’s presence that you don’t even need words to express it.

I have also found that I am someone that does not really like “casual conversation” topics because let’s be honest do we actually care?

Comments like, “I love this weather!” It is just a filler. A “polite” thing to say when in another’s company. (See I could only come up with one example, that is how bad I am at this! Hahaha!)

But does anyone in the conversation actually care about the weather? Okay maybe, but most likely they do not. It is just something to fill the air so that we do not die of awkwardness.

I have always been the kind of person that people will tell their deepest, darkest secrets to. Maybe that is why seemingly idle conversation is so difficult for me…because I am used to listening to heavy topics so something like the weather holds little to no meaning to me. Do I still try my best? Absolutely…okay not all the time. Sometimes I let the awkward silence stew until the other person can’t stand it anymore and has to break it with their words.

I say all this not to make you think I do not care to have conversations…I just prefer to have deep and truly meaningful conversations. Do I want to know everyone’s life story and all their trauma and problems? I mean if it helps them…then yes! I do know that not every conversation can or will or even should be of that importance but…sometimes I would like them to be.

Okay I think I got a little off topic…reel it back in Kaylie! Companionable silence is a beautiful thing to me because it shows that you truly have a deeper understanding of and connection to each other. It shows that you are so comfortable in each others company that you have no need for the superficial. You have a level of authenticity in your relationship that goes beyond the surface. I think that any positive connection we as humans can make is beautiful and important and this type of connection is definitely on the list.