I feel myself becoming more and more introverted…I have never been a super outgoing or extroverted person so I have had to work on it for many years. Now that it is slipping away from me I fear I will not be able to fight for it.
I feel the words pushing against my lips begging to escape but I have no control. I have no power to open my mouth and speak. I know what I want to say, I just can’t seem to say it. I rub my clammy hands together in anxiety as people pass me by. It is my job to say hi, it is my job to talk. Why can’t I? I look down at the floor in embarrassment. I am an adult, I feel as if it is the least I could do to talk to a stranger. It has never been this difficult for me.
I have dealt with anxiety but not this kind. I feel as if I am in a constant exhausting fight against myself. I am ashamed of my anxiety. I am ashamed that I am finding it so difficult to communicate. I am annoyed with myself.
Living it Up Halfheartedly 